Took forever, but happiness is here - FINALLY: September 2010

Sunday, September 12, 2010

In Loving Memory of my sister, Kathy

Kathy in the early 70s - she was about 18 or 19 here

Today is September 12, 2010. My sister, Kathy Davis, died eight years ago today.

Kathy was this amazingly vibrant and talented woman who had a smile that would light up any room she was in. People were just naturally drawn to her.

She battled alcohol for many, many years. Eventually, her liver just gave up. She died of complications of cirrhosis. It was a very long, very drawn out death - one I wouldn't wish on anyone.

There isn't a day that passes that I don't think of her and wish she were still here. My 10 year old daughter does and says so many things that I know would tickle Kathy to pieces. And so often I'll tell my daughter, "Your Aunt Kathy sure marked you, Kiddo." :)

Anyway, I just wanted to mark her passing on the 8th anniversary of that sad day. Her death has left an empty place in our family. There were 5, now there are 4 of us kids left. It just left a "hole", ya know?

Kathy, I hope once you crossed over, you found the peace you were always searching for.

I love you,
Jewie

Kathy, 1995-ish

Kathy, 1994

Kathy - 1994 (promo pic)

Kathy and Lucas
1981

Kathy's son, Lucas - now

Saturday, September 11, 2010

September 11, 2010

Good Saturday morning. :)

I've got so much rattling around in my head today, I don't know quite where to start.

Today is the 9th anniversary of the attack of September 11, 2001. That year, as a whole, was one of the toughest of my life. My mom had died of metasticized breast cancer on June 28th that year; my sister, Kathy, was dying from cirrhosis related complications (she lived exactly 1 year and 1 day after Sept. 11, 2001), and I had a young child (she was not quite 18 months when the attacks happened). I felt like a walking ghost myself that year - my body was present, but my spirit was so bruised from losing Mama, I just wasn't myself at all. All I can recall about that day specifically was feeling totally "lost."

Fast forward to 2010: all over the news & tv this a.m. are remembrances of that day. And we have this yahoo preacher in Gainesville, FL, who's itching to burn a trailer-full of Korans. Yeah, let's stir all those radical Muslims up - NOT! I HATE religion AND politics. No good can ever come of either of them. In my simple little brain, I cannot for the life of me understand why people just can't leave people alone! I don't care WHAT religion you practice - Christianity, Muslim, Buddhist, Pagan, WHATEVER - it's personal. Keep it to yourself. Don't try to "recruit" me or anyone else to your way of thinking. Live your life - do what YOU know is right for yourself and your family, but keep it personal.

I don't believe there is any one "right" religion. If your faith sustains you, brings you joy and comfort, then it's the "right one" for you. Right? Everyone thinks their God is the only one, and I think it's great that they have that much faith and belief, but everyone else is just as confident that the way the believe and worship is just as right. Who is ANYONE to say that any of us is right or wrong? It's what you feel in your heart that matters most.

I live in the Bible Belt, and sometimes I think I'm the only one who doesn't attend a church around here.  Anyone who thinks Christianity isn't as corrupt as Muslims is sadly mistaken. I'm not saying it's all bad, but look at all the crap that goes on: preachers stealing money from the offering plate, Catholic priests molesting little boys, pastors & parishioners sleeping with each other, etc., etc. That isn't how it's supposed to be. Hell, people just need to do the right thing - all the time - period. I don't care WHAT religion you are - DO THE RIGHT THING.

The churches that "require" their priests to be celibate are just asking for trouble. They forget that above all else, these priests are just human - not perfect god(s). And sex is a human condition - it feels good, we all want to do it. So, by forbidding it, does it not make them want to try it that much more? I know when, as a child, I was told I couldn't do something, it made me want to try it that much more.  And these priests/preachers are the head of so many people - people who just want to be loved and made to feel needed/wanted by these charismatic men. And so often, men & women are unable to separate physical love from emotional love. To them, it's one and the same.

Religion, in itself, can be a dangerous thing in some instances. People take it to extremes - in EVERY religion. And they're all convinced they're doing the right thing. Their way is the ONLY right way in their eyes: those poor saps who all committed suicide in Jonestown, the ones who were going to hop a ride on the Hale-Bopp Comet, the folks in Waco, and the list goes on and on. They were all fed a bunch of s**t by people who virtually "hypnotized" them with their garbage.

I am not a "joiner" of anything. I am perfectly content with loving my family and friends - those are the only groups I'll ever join. I have faith and belief in a Divine Something-or-Other - I don't even know what to call it. But I know that I treat people with respect and I behave with honor and integrity, and I am truthful. I will help people when they are in need, I offer my friendship and support to them, and they know I am true-blue through and through. I pay my bills, honor my agreements, and I don't make promises I can't keep. And I am doing my best to teach my daughter to be the same way.   Because, when it's all said & done, your character is what counts the most - no matter what religious label you fall under.

And that's what's on my mind this morning. Hope I didn't put you to sleep. :P

Love & Light to you all,
Jules

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Two and a half years later....Life is better than good

Well, friends it's been 2-1/2 years since my last Blog. Sooo much has changed in my life in that time. I haven't even been on this page to do ANYTHING at all in all that time.

I met Jerry, my partner, in October 2009. It is now September 2010, and I have never been happier in my entire life. This wonderful man came into my life when I was at an all-time low - I had lost my faith in love, in happiness, in so many things, and his sweet spirit just surrounded me with love, acceptance, trust, and all things "happy." He is my best friend and my biggest supporter - I've never known a man like him in all my life. And to put the icing on the cake, he loves my daughter as if she were his own. And she thinks he hung the moon. So, yes, life is better than good these days. :)

We've done lots of travelling this year. We went to St. Augustine for Xmas 2009, then a Caribbean cruise with the kids in April; then a trip to Helen, GA in June, and then another trip to St. Augustine in July. And we've just firmed up our Xmas travel plans for this year. We've rented a 3 bedroom condo in St. Augustine for a whole week with the kids. I can hardly wait! I'm loving all this travelling, and St. Augustine is fast becoming a place I absolutely LOVE. Got to do a couple of "ghost hunts" - which was lots of fun for me. I've always liked to watch shows & read books about ghosties, so it just tickled me to finally get to go on some ghost hunts of my own. We don't get in any rush when we go places - Jerry is just so laid back, and we don't "plan" out any formal activities until we get there and decide what we're in the mood to do & see.

We're tentatively planning a trip to Scotland - not anytime soon - but in the not-too-distant future. Jerry is retired Navy and has been all over the world - a few times, but he's ready to see alot of the world as a "tourist." So, he's all for seeing some of the places I've always dreamed of going to. We try to sample at least one "weird" food item when we go places. So far, Mag & I have tried calamari, gator tail, escargot, and conch. We're not up to par with Andrew Zimmern's "Bizarre Foods" by any stretch of the imagination, but hey, we're doing pretty good for two gals from 'Bama. LOL There's not much in the culinary department Jerry hasn't tried, so, he's introducing us to new things all the time. And speaking of food - this man is a FABULOUS cook, too. He usually has the main course ready when I get home from work, and then I'll finish up with the vegies and sides. He's been retired since 1994, and so stays home while the kids are in school and I go to work. He keeps this 6 acre yard and our home in tip-top shape, too. He's like the energizer bunny around here. :)

Jerry's son, Royce, is going to turn 17 next month, and he's been a wonderful addition to our lives as well. Mag looks up to him, and he's a young man with great strength of character, humor, and very goal oriented. The day after he turns 17, he will receive his private pilot's license. He is gearing up for college already - Embry Riddle. And he will be joining the Air Force after that - will go in as an officer. I've never seen ANY kid so goal-oriented in my life! He knows what he's going to do for the rest of his life as far as his career goes. He is passionate about flying - and is really good at it. He flies over the house when he goes out, and gives us a "wave" with the wings of the aircraft sometimes. It's really cool!

I guess, for a first blog in 2-1/2 years, this one's a good one. I was so unhappy all that time ago - and now, I'm in such a different place. I'm no longer on the "defense" all the time, my child is happy, healthy, and well adjusted, and I'm in love with the man I've always dreamed of having in my life. Color me "at peace & happy."

And I have to thank Jerry for bringing all of this to me & Maggie. His gentle spirit, his easy smile, his "realness", his genuine loving heart - all of this has enriched my world more than words can say. Thank you, Jerry, for loving us, for always being there (come hell or highwater), and for taking such good care of your girls.

Until next time...

Love & Light to you all. :)

Thought I'd share some pix of my family.